Signs that you're getting older
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- Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work.
- You get winded playing chess.
- Your children begin to look middle aged.
- You walk with your head held high because you're trying to get used to your bifocals.
- You turn out the light for economic reasons rather than romantic ones.
- You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.
- Your knees buckle and your belt won't.
- You regret all those mistakes resisting temptation.
- After painting the town red, you have to take a long rest before applying a second coat.
- Dialing long distance wears you out.
- You just can't stand people who are intolerant.
- The best part of your day is over when your alarm clock goes off.
- You burn the midnight oil until 9 p.m.
- Your back goes out more often than you do.
- The little gray-haired lady you help across the street is your wife.
- You have too much room in the house and not enough in the medicine cabinet.
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