Insanity Part III

Never be afraid to try something new.
Remember, amateurs built the ark.
Professionals built the Titanic.

"Life isn't like a box of's more like a jar of jalapenos."
What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
Jack Nicholson

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day;
teach that person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

Work keeps at bay three great evils:
boredom, vice, and need.

Some people are like Slinkies...not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

Not believing in force is the same as not believing in gravitation.
- Leon Trotsky

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
- William Rogers Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock. - William Rogers

Chaos, panic + disorder - my work here is done.

Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you weren't asleep.

Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

Nice perfume, must you marinate in it?

Love is an ocean of emotions, entirely surrounded by expenses.
- Thomas Dewar

silly user

Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.

Stupidity got us into this mess - why can't it get us out?

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly and for the same reason.

My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely.

One of life's mysteries is how a 2 pound box of candy can make a woman gain 5 lbs.

An optimist thinks that this is the best possible world.
A pessimist fears that this is true.

I don't mind going nowhere as long as it's an interesting path.

Indecision is the key to flexibility.

My inferiority complex is not as good as yours.

I always wanted to be a procrastinator,
never got around to it.

There is always death and taxes;
however death doesn't get worse every year.

It's easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them.

I am in shape. Round is a shape.

You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.

The nice part about living in a small town is that when
you don't know what you're doing, someone else does.

You don't stop laughing because you grow old,
you grow old because you stopped laughing.

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